Road trip!
You and the family are four hours in.
The thermos of coffee has taken its toll.
Now it’s time for a bathroom break.
You come to a rest stop and head toward the bathroom.
There are kids and teenagers all over the place.
Phone are blaring.
Kids are having a conversation and playing in the stalls.
It’s NUTS!
All you want to do is use the bathroom in peace.
You wonder if they know about rules for using public restrooms.
This article will give you 7 distinct guidelines that should be made into man law when using the bathroom.
1. Stall Staggering
Few things are more irritating when there are plenty of urinals or stalls available and a guy walks and sits/stand right next to you. It’s simple; keep some distance between me and you and this can be done by skipping latrines. Using the restroom is an intimate moment that’s for
- Relief – You could have been holding it for a while or maybe you have a stomach ache
- Privacy – guys are literally exposing themselves physically when standing at a urinal
- Peace – some guys are on a date or meeting and need a time out
In the event that you are in a restroom that has one of those long that do not have the dividers, you want to make sure that you are about 12 – 18 inches away from the closest guy. You also want to turn your back to him so that there will be no false assumptions and accusations.
2 . Conversation Etiquette
To be frank, keep the conversations at a minimum. It’s actually my preference that you say nothing to the next guy while going.
This is not a time to be social and discuss politics or sports. If you must say something, do it at the sink. It’s less weird there. Generally speaking, people look at each other when they are talking. Do you want some dude staring at the side of your head or trying to make eye contact while you are taking a wiz?
When at the urinal you want to:
- Keep your eyes front – once you glance down at you target, stare at the wall. You might make the guy uncomfortable if you keep looking down. He could mistake you for trying to take a peek.
- Lean your head back and look up at the ceiling
Also, please don’t get involved in a conversation between a father and his son. This is a time when dad needs to give junior the house rules so that he will know how to conduct himself accordingly. It’s honestly kind of creepy.
3. Phone Etiquette
Yes, there should be rules when talking on the phone in the stall. As I stated previously, using the restroom is a private moment that can – in many cases – require a great deal of concentration. As such follow these simple rules to keep everyone who is in the can comfortable.
- Keep volume low – bathrooms echo so actually speak softer than a soft voice
- Don’t talk about the smell or sounds in the bathroom – it’s a public restroom full of men, odor is to be expected. Plus it’s rude and tacky to make crass statements.
- Use headphones – this will free your hands and minimize you dropping your phone on the bathroom floor
- Don’t use the speaker phone – no one wants to hear your full conversation
- No music – use your earbuds if you need some tunes to relax.
4. Where Do You Place Your Drink
If at all possible, do not take your drink into the restroom with you. Restrooms are a haven for germs. Leave your beverage at the table or with a trusted friend. Stuff happens and that’s not always possible, if you must take your drink with you
- Use the shelf that’s above the urinal – this is commonly seen in places where it’s not always feasible to leave your drink out in the open such as airports and nightclubs/lounges
- Place on the counter by the sink if you’re the only one in the restroom or if you’re in a single use bathroom
- Set your drink on the toilet paper dispenser if you are in the stall. This way you can watch your drink.
Some guys are skilled enough to leave it in their hand. If that is not you, then don’t bother trying Also, NEVER place it on the floor or let your drink leave your sight. It seems like a no-brainer but it definitely happens.
5. Short Urinal Is for Kids
You’re an adult so use what men are supposed to use. The smaller urinal is designed so that the little gents can do their business without making a mess.
It’s lower so that he can aim better. If you see a shorter or lower urinal available but there is a boy behind you, give him the right of way. You don’t want him to have an accident.
6. The Stalls Are a Hidden Opportunity
During the game or at the theme park, the lines in the restroom can be abysmally long. Most times the wait is for the urinal. Though it doesn’t take long to take a leak, it can seem like an eternity when you really have to go.
Step out of line and check to see if a stall is available. In many instances there will be some that are empty and you can do your business there. Every guy in the line will appreciate that you are speeding things up.
There’s added privacy when you go to use a stall too. You don’t have to worry about that eerie feeling that the guy next to you is taking a peak or is going to start some weird conversation while you both are holding your johnson.
Guys, please make sure that your aim is good too. Clean up after yourself if you have a misfire. It’s totally irresponsible and immature to leave a pissy mess all over the seat. Situations like that can cause a real problem when the next guy has an emergency and has to take extra steps to go. None wants to clean up another man’s urine. Also, teach your sons and nephews to do the same.
7. Sinks Are Never an Option
I don’t care how drunk you are, don’t do it. It’s better if you go out back and pick a dark corner to relieve yourself. We wash our hands in there…our hands that touch our kids, food, face, etc.
If you are an adult male, the odds are that you are potty trained. You can wait it out. Look for a stall if you have to go that bad. There is a chance there will be one available.
